Next step?

I am back in Melbourne and it is great to be back though I struggled to cope with the weather at first. One thing that I miss dearly was the coffee culture. Yes, I am a coffee addict/snob. Nothing is better than cycling around for a decent cup of coffee. I think I actually owe my degree to coffee. If I didn't study to be a vet, I might have been a barista. Haha.

It sums up how I function.

Another thing is that I got into a master program at Edinburgh. So unless anything better pop up before the middle of 2014, I will be heading to Scotland!

Love is All You Need?

I am getting ready to travel back to Melbourne and I will just land back in time for the Melbourne International Film Festival 2013. The films shown on the festival are usually pretty weird and artsy in a good way. Somehow while I was browsing around, I stumbled across this interesting short film which is rather though provoking (well, for me at least). The film is a few years old and it is not MIFF though.

The film is called Love is All You Need? I couldn't help thinking that it would be quite nice if the world was actually like the film - GLBT being the 'normal' and the majority.

How one should live one's live?

I stumbled across this picture ages ago (and I can't recall where I found it). At that time, I was struggling through my veterinary course and I was quite lost. The message on the picture gave me courage and I would probably need that courage again when I start a job hunt. I have been travelling around and been really busy. Hopefully once I get a job and settle in, I will have more time to post regularly.

Yes, I have done the travel often part. I think I need to stop over analysing.

I'm not the only gay person in my family?!?

Nowadays, our mobile phone holds so much information about ourselves. Just checking the photo albums - they will speak thousands words about who we are and what we do. There are some rather private photos that would even provide too much information. Apart from that glancing through the search history provides clues of our personal interests. I can still be a tad more careful about these sort of information on my phone but sometimes it is a bother trying to cover all the traces. However, the thought of confidential stuff slipping through scares me. That is why I take precautions when passing my iPhone to anyone whether sharing a photo of food I devoured or a photo of a hot guy cuddling a kitten in bed though I am generally less concerned with my friends who know that I'm gay.

In Asia, talking about sex is a taboo so let alone talking to sexuality and being gay. Fortunately, it is becoming a lot more accepting in Thailand (after all, Thailand is considered a paradise for gay). People can be quite oblivious about this too so they never notice anything and my mum snuggles this group. The concepts of family structure between Western and Eastern cultures differ in a interesting way. Asians tend to be very family oriented  and usually include extended family members as our family too i.e. aunt, uncle, cousin etc. Recently I had just a little family lunch out - there were my mum, little cousin, uncle A (my mum's brother), uncle's friend P and me. A few pieces of fact about my uncle A and P - A has known P for more than 20 years and they met while working in a bank. So P is pretty much seen as part of the family and everyone in my family adores him. 

I hate stereotypes but they exist to categorise people and they work well at times. It is bad to generalise based on stereotypes but I often use them as a frame work of mind to build more information upon. I can say that A and P fit too many gay stereotypes. A and P have shared many important moments of life and spend a lot of time together. They bought an apartment next to each other and bought a house together. They are still single. Their sense of fashion, design, sensibility, manner, attitude towards life, open mindedness, wealth and love to travel surpass that of the straights.

What do the searches say about me?

I had always suspected A and P for ages but never really have a proof to confirm. Until on our way back to Bangkok after a delightful lunch, I was trying to search a famous kitchen showroom but I don't have internet on my phone. P was driving and told me that I could use his phone. However, I noticed a brief moment of hesitation before he passed his phone to me. It was that moment I realise there must be something private in his phone that he didn't want me to see. I was determined not to peek into his privacy so I just tapped into Safari and started keying on the search engine. Then the search history fanned out and there was a search phrase that caught my eyes "japan gay porn". That phrase only raises a lot of probabilities and questions. Now it is time to ponder - what is the chance of someone else using P's phone? It is extremely unlikely since P rarely lets anyone use his phone. Who else know the password to access P's phone? My uncle A and he often plays games on P's phone! What can I conclude? The person who typed the search phrase is probably either A or P. Even though what I found is not a concrete piece of evidence, it is the missing piece of jigsaw and everything makes sense.

Now should I tell them about my sexuality? Not yet, there is a few things I need to do before that but I talk to them before telling my mum. Another heart warming piece of fact is that my mum is quite close to my uncle A and is very fond of P.

Ex-Boyfriend D

So many things have happened in a blink of an eye. Boyfriend D and I are no longer together. It turned out that he is struggling with his sexuality and faith. While we were together, he kept everything to himself and it ate him away. He now believes that God will change him and turn him straight.  He decided that we should cut all the contact. Well, I have accepted that it is something beyond my control and he is gone. Moving On 101 begins, I guess.

Time will pass and the pain will go away someday

I guess if I ever refer to him again, it would be ex-Boyfriend D.

Happy Valentine's Day

I am back in Thailand for a long holiday at home and hopefully I will have more free time to blog more regular from now on.

Our 1 year anniversary was just a few weeks ago and somehow I booked a flight from Melbourne to Bangkok on that date! I had a lapse of memory and booked with an odd feeling when I looked at the date. From time to time, I made a judgement like this and it's so embarrassing. Boyfriend D still makes a joke about this :D

Lovely deliciousness

Boyfriend D and I have been together just over one year. Last year, I was on a university placement, drove to Sydney and didn't have the chance to spend Valentine's Day with him. Once I got back, I gave him a belated Valentine: a red rose and a box of macarons. Generally, Boyfriend D eats too quickly and devours everything within seconds. He treasured the macarons too much and ate them too slowly that I was concerned they might be spoiled before he finished them.

Things are anti-climatic this year. We are not even not the same continent and there is a 4 hours time different. It makes communication somewhat difficult. There were so many couples acting lovey-dovey everywhere and I wished I could be with Boyfriend D. I texted him a picture below and saying that I miss cuddling him.

Cuddle me please~

How was your Valentine's Day?

I did it! I am a vet!

The past week has been excruciating. I just finished all my exams and found out on Friday night that I passed everything. This is so unreal and I still feel like I am dreaming. I am a vet at las :)

Hmm,, now what?